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3 Things You And Your Partner Should Agree On Before Starting A Family

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If you and your partner are ready to start a family together, talking about the future can be fun. Coming up with names for the children you’re dreaming of having, thinking about the fun day outs and holidays you might go on, imagining how happy your kids will be when you bring a puppy home to surprise them with – there are a lot of lovely situations to mull over! But you also have to get the hard talks out of the way too. Family planning needs a stable foundation to it, and if you and your partner haven’t taken the time to consider the three things below, you’ll need to focus on them over the next few weeks. Get a proper look inside each others’ heads and see where you both stand.  Pexels Image – CC0 Licence How Big Would You Like Your Family to Be? Some people only want one child, some people want to have a girl and a boy, some people want three or more, and some don’t mind at all!  No matter what your family looks like in your head, see what your partner is imagining. The images don’t have to match up, but it’s best to find common ground here.  What Can You Afford? In 2025, it seems like parenting has only gotten more expensive, and much more than it ever was before. On average, the cost of raising a child in the UK is £260,000 for couples.  As such, strict budgeting is essential, and getting into that routine before having children is key to developing good, long-term financial habits. Remember, it’s not just childcare costs you may need to budget for. Indeed, you may need IVF in order to start your family, and that’s a potential you should discuss at this point, as you may not have access to free IVF treatment on the NHS.  What Parenting Style Would You Prefer? You may have very different ideas about parenting and what it involves, and you’ll need to get those out into the air before you start a family together. Expectations around things like childcare, discipline, and important milestones should be talked about in advance, to ensure there’s no tension around these subjects later on.  For example, what kind of school do you want your child to go to, and does your partner want the same thing? If your child misbehaves, are you on the same page about what an appropriate punishment will be?  Getting these discussions out of the way is crucial to a smooth path ahead. Nothing has to be set in stone at this point, but you should have a clear idea of what each other wants regarding parenting life.  Starting a family is a big decision, and it’s best not to take it lightly. Make sure you and your partner have time to talk about the future and what you both want. The clearer the path ahead seems, the more enjoyable and stress-free family planning tends to be. 

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